Saturday, June 24, 2006

Change, change, and more change

There are two distinct sides to me. I love change. I love dynamic activity, constant motion, never sitting still, lots of variables. But, on the other hand, I hate change. I don't like change I can't control or decide on. I don't like it when things outside of my control change. I like control and I like change. And lately there have been a lot of changes. There have been changes within my family, changes to my friends, changes in my work responsibilities, changes at home, etc. All things outside of my control. Some are good changes, some are negative. But changes nonetheless.
Some of the changes I welcome- I'm moving soon, I've got a new car, new roommates in the new house. I'm excited for some of these changes. But there's so many changes happening at once right now (add to the list, no more column, new part time job), that I feel like I'm sinking. There's this wierd feeling to realize that by the end of the summer, my life will barely resemble the life I have today. It's good and it's bad, but it's mostly just hard to swallow. I'm pretty good at just picking up and dealing and rolling with the punches. Bring on the change! I love change! But give me a chance to accept what is happening around me!
I can't share much more of the changes that are happening out of respect for other people's wishes. Some are simple, some are more complex- like the loss of friendships. Others are learning to live with the choices other people have made, and respecting their wishes and choices.
So yes, there are changes afoot. Life is rapidly looking less and less like yesterday. Bear with me and have a little patience. Construction zone ahead.

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