Showing posts from November, 2006

What They Didn't Teach You in Second Grade...

What they didn't teach you in second grade is that some day a girl will reject you for failing primary school grammar.

Case in point-
Here is an email I received today.

boy howdie!!!! you are a lot to take in I'm simple with a wild side for
life but on the down hill of it trying to be good is an adventure for me I don't
look for trouble or even the opportunity of trouble but it finds me pretty easy.
I'm a small town loving boy that has no idea what to do but just live like
there's no tomorrow with no regrets. and have FUN Ive tryed to live by the motto
just livin and Ive done good so far. so if I'm not outgoing enough adventures
enough or even cool enough which I'm probably not than that's coool

Items to Note
1. Sadly, everything he needed to know to impress me he should have learned approximately 21 years ago. (He's 29.)
2. On the list of reasons he will never hear back from me you will find, "I can't bear the burden of being the sole teacher of gramm…

Paging Dr. House??

This week I have re-discovered the joys of Vicodin. Granted, I had to bruise my coccyx to find the joys, but find them I did.

Things I have done while hopped up on drugs this week-

1. Made a phone call at 1 a.m. The recipient found it amusing. Or at least in my drugged up state I perceived his response as amused.

2. Convinced myself that sleeping in full fleece sweats with a heating pad, comforter, flannel sheets, and a fur blanket was a good idea. (woke up a few hours later covered and sweat and sick)

3. Convinced myself that it had been 6 hours since my last dose of pills. When in fact it had only been three. The logic behind this was something like, "by the time i walk to the kitchen, drink some milk, take my pill, use the bathroom, and get back in bed it will have been almost 2 hours, and then it takes an hour to kick in. so really, that's like 6 hours, right?"

4. Had a very bizarre dream where an ex-boyfriend (currently married with children) got divorced, came back to m…

Predictions of Advil

Today I will be sitting on a cushion and heating pad at work while editing a catalog that includes such genius phrases as, "This is a fundamental peculiarity using the shotgun during high risk operations and the shotgun works perfectly in all climatic conditions, ranging from very cold to hot and humid."

Why the cushion and hot pad? My tailbone got a pretty good bump on it (seriously, there's a decent sized goose egg on my coccyx) while riding on Saturday.

And why the editing? Because it isn't normal for people to say things like "a fundamental peculiarity."

I feel a lot of Advil coming on.
For reasons unknown to me, Blogger is insisting on posting my last 2 entries in reverse order. For this I apologize for their stupidity. Please skip down to the heading "AN Extremely Erin Day" read that post, and then jump back up here to the picture of my dad and brother and continue from the top.
Several months ago I bought my dad a Px4 Storm, and he has yet to get to shoot it. So we took it out and gave it a whirl. I'm not sure if my mother had ever shot a gun before, but I can pretty much guarantee that she'll never do it again. I gave everyone a brief safety and shooting lesson, then put them on the line and let them go. Mom went first. She did everything right and followed all the rules without hesitation. And then we wait, and we wait, and we wait, as she pulls the long double action trigger at a snail's pace. Finally she pulls the dang thing, fires off one shot, (I think she screamed), threw the gun down on the bench, and ran out of the room. I followed her out into the holding area, where she explains to me (while still covering her ears, which were well covered by her hearing protection) that "I saw flames! There were flames everywhere!" I convinced her to come back in for a second, but she lasted only long enough to get the keys and go hide in th…

An Extremely Erin Day

Today turned out to be an Extremely Erin Day, and quite by accident. Of course, I think it only happened because of yesterday's blog where I said I felt like I haven't been me much lately. Well, today made up for that in spades!

First, I went horseback riding with my sister Stephanie, on our horse "Streaker." He is a rescued race horse, and his racing name was Decorated Streak. Steph volunteers out at the rescue farm every week, and has worked very hard to train Streaker.

Until recently Steph was the only one allowed on her beloved Streak. But she has now allowed her boyfriend Joel to ride him, and today for the first time, me. It has been several years since the last time I was on a horse. Sadly, my horrible horsemanship showed in most of the pictures we took today, so this is the only one I am willing to post of me.

Also at the rescue farm there are several baby horses waiting to be adopted. I fell in love with this one several months ago, and then fell in love with …

Thankful for Tryptophan

There's a lot going on right now. Just enough going on that I have little energy left to blog a whole lot. Bottom line- work is kicking my butt. Plus there's all those other responsibilities to deal with like singles conferences, building a side business, writing a book, cleaning my bathroom, and calling for pizza.
One of the bigger stresses in my life is also taking an assessment of my life. In the past few years I have made some major goals for myself, and for the most part, I have done a decent job of accomplishing them, or at least moved in the right directions. Those have included buying a car, publishing a book, and some other things.
Some of my bigger long-term goals also include home ownership and becoming a foster mother. This will require some other major changes in my life, (which due to the fact that sometimes you can't trust people to not go running their mouths to the wrong people can't be outlined further here), and this weekend I made some big step…

Polygamists Fight to Be Seen As Part of Mainstream Society -

Polygamists Fight to Be Seen As Part of Mainstream Society -

Let me make something clear-
1. There was nothing in this article that was newsworthy of the front page of the Washington Post.
2. It failed miserably to explain what a Mormon is, so allow me to help you there. First, a Mormon is anyone who believes in the Book of Mormon. The Book of Mormon is a book that its believers and followers consider to be a second testament (the first is the Bible) of Jesus Christ. The Book of Mormon was restored to the Earth by way of the translation skills of a prophet, Joseph Smith, Jr. This in turn restored the Gospel and the Lord's Church (which fell away in the years following Christ's death, causing the splitting up of His established church, and the creation of so many different factions of churches). After Joseph Smith established this new and restored church, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter day Saints, he was martyred. And shortly following his martyrdo…

Winter Holiday? or Christmas?

I grew up in a house without Santa Claus. We believed in him until the appropriate ages, and then that was it. There was never an Easter Bunny in our house either. However, the Tooth Fairy had a good long reign over my pillow. During the Christmas season you will not find little Santas, reindeer, or any other commercial object adorning my parents' house. You will find many religious decorations, and beautiful trimmings throughout. My dad engrained it into us young that Christmas was about the birth of Christ and not about Jolly Old Saint Nicholas. And Easter is about the Life and Resurrection of Christ, and not about chocolate bunnies. I can only recall getting one Easter basket in my life, and that was in the fifth grade. However, my family does pull out all the stops for Christmas gift-giving.

So what's my point? I really can't stand tacky Christmas decorations. North Pole re-creations, flying reindeer, and these new monstrous sized "snow globes" peo…

A Few Changes

There's a few changes going on in my life right now. New priorities, responsibilities, interests, and directions. They will each slowly reveal themselves on the blog with time. Today we will start with some of the political hobbies that have resurfaced. If you have known me for more than 5 years you probably think of me as a very politically active person that has been taking a break for a little while. If you have known me less than five years you may not know that I ever had much of an interest in politics at all. And if you have very different political leanings from me you probably have heard me explain my views a few times.
Well, I'm back in the game again full force. I have started a Virginiansfor Mitt Romney for President blog. As well as a blog on the Race for the White House 2008 blog. I am actively working on the Romney blog, and I'll soon get to putting content on the Race blog. They will serve very different purposes. The Romney blog is obviously supportive of h…

Happiness is not... and Happiness is...

Happiness is not...
a sore throat, throbbing head, fever, and overall awful achey-ness with a 6 hour solo drive from NC back home to VA ahead of you.

Happiness is...
the moment your Tylenol flu finally kicks in and you sink back into your own bed after 3 nights out of town.

She Really is the Antithesis of Boring (she just can't spell it)

I missed her going away party and her birthday. But that doesn't mean I don't love her! Happy Birthday Steph! Welcome to my side of 30!

i will be rich and i will run the world some day

Recently I've been reading two different books (okay, actually reading one, while listening to the other on cd). The first book, "Rich Dad, Poor Dad," by Robert Kiyoski, is about personal wealth and finances. The second book is "The World is Flat," by Thomas Friedman, and is about the history of the world through the evolution of economics. I am not one who really ever thinks about money for very long, but I do like to think about the consequences of business of every day life. Reading these two mooks simultaneously has my mind going nonstop about the plight of the middle class, and those who want to rise above and gain more wealth. "Rich Dad" presents a formula for how to acquire wealth. "Flat" explains the rise and fall of various financial empires. This has been an interesting educational experience!
For many people "Rich Dad" is a ground breaking and fascinating book. Apparently to these people the concepts taught inside…

My Village

I attended the funeral of a long time family friend today. Rather than discuss the funeral or pay tribute to a good man today, my thoughts are on what a unique experience it was to be in the room with nearly every adult that had an influence on my life. I know most of the readers of this blog won't know these names, and I apologize for that. But since I know several of the readers are old friends who will enjoy some memories, I will share a few.

I grew up in both Centreville and Oakton, VA. Personally I lived longer in Centreville than I did in Oakton. But overall, my family lived longer in Oakton, and my father was the Bishop there, so it feels more like that is our hometown than anything. I graduated from high school in Oakton, and therefore I will have to claim it as home.

Oakton was a unique place to grow up. Living there meant being in a ward where presidential elections had personal meaning to several ward members. During one presidential election year 4 major players …

20th Annual Northern Virginia Single Adult Conference

20th Annual Northern Virginia Single Adult Conference
The price of freedom is eternal vigilance. - Thomas Jefferson

For the last several months all of my free time (that isn't consumed by blogging) has been devoted to planning the 20th Annual Northern Virginia Single Adult Conference. When I was first approached about planning this conference I groaned and begged for mercy. After all, I've been to this conference once before- as a speaker. Juli and I were writing our column on singles and dating still and had been invited to speak at this conference on exactly that- singles and dating. I think Juli will second me when I say it was one of the most depressing experiences of my life. I was days away from turning 30 and standing in front of this "singles" (and therefore by the LDS Church definition over 31 yrs old) was eye opening and depressing. I think we found that in a room of 100 singles, probably 70 were over 50, and there was maybe 20 men in the room. And t…

how many metros have you been in?

How many metros have you been in? This is my list- DC, London, Prague, Bucharest, Brussels, Paris and Los Angeles. Not too shabby considering most of have been within the last 3 years!
Check out this site to make your own list!

Got at!

The Nephews Rock Out

Have you ever seen such talented footwork, armpits or amazing rhythm??

Is there an end to always?

It has been another one of those days/weeks/months where so much of my life and schedule is dictated by events and people I have no control or influence over. I can put my heart and soul into doing what I truly to be the best thing, working devotedly to doing a good job, and then this all-powerful hand that has never once met me or bothered to ask me a question, can come and squash my efforts. It has nothing to do with me. Nothing to do with my efforts, and just the whims and ideas of an outside party. The apologies always come down with "It has nothing to do with you... It isn't that we don't think you can handle it..." And while I know that those comments are somehow supposed to make it all better, it doesn't. In fact, it is more insulting. My efforts are a part of me. I put a part of myself into everything that I do. And then someone comes around and says that it was insignificant. How can I help it if that makes me feel insignificant as a result? Is it even f…

Overwhelming Urge

Does anyone else have an overwhelming urge to sing "Ding dong the witch is dead," now that Saddam Hussein has been sentenced to death?
Good riddance!

When all you know is you don't know what you want

I have reached one of "those" points in my life. I couldn't begin to tell you what it is I want, but I can give you a long list of things I don't want in my life. I don't want boredom. I don't want student loans. I don't want to live in some boxy apartment again. I don't want a desk job. I hate desk jobs. I do know that I hate holding myself back because there are so few around me that I can trust. Fear of backstabbers keeps me from being myself. The fear of history repeating itself keeps me from doing the things that I want the most. I don't know that I can go for the things that I want the most because I may lose what I have already in the process. I do want there to be more to life than this dull repetition.

In just 3.5 short days...

In the last 3.5 short days of being with my nephews, darling little Porter (age 21 months) has managed to do the following.
1. Bit the gel handle on my hairbrush, pulling off the "skin" of the handle, leaking the gel out.
2. Threw my shoe in the toilet.
3. Broke my glasses.
4. Painted a wall with my mascara.
5. Poured a Diet Coke in my Coach purse (thankfully my ghetto wallet was in there and soaked it all up)
6. Screamed bloody murder every time I so much as brushed by him, and then when my friend, a complete stranger to him, walked in, he ran up to him, offered him candy, and sat in his lap.

After which I nearly scheduled an emergency tube tying. But then...

7. He let me hold him for 1 whole minute before bed tonight without screaming, crying, threatening to pass out, or hitting me. And even smiled in my general direction. Of course, we had to totally brainwash him into it, but it worked! Brainwashing- I would grab him, he'd scream, but his mom would cheer like it was a good t…

Halloween- Utah Style

I have arrived in Utah with the sole purpose of going trick or treating with my nephews. As you can see, they didn't disappoint me. Tell was a white ninja, Dallin a football player, and Porter a bumble bee. Their mom, Natalie, was Wilma Flintstone. And I was a very cool witch. The boys had a lot of fun running from door to door, in spite of the cold Utah night. The boys got some pretty decent loot, and the adults in the house have raided it well. Tell is allergic to all nuts so he gave up all candy with nuts in it pretty fast. Dallin for some reason doesn't like crunchy candy and has very willingly offered it all to me. I've collected all of his Almond Joys, Butterfingers, Snickers, and Crunch bars. I've also convinced him M&M's, Reeses Pieces, and Reeses Cups are also very crunchy.
Natalie and I got hair cuts today and went shopping. Natalie apparently doesn't know the first rule of shopping with Erin, which is never leave me alone in a mall …

Aunt Erin's Cool Witch Costume


A little bumbling Porter

Porter's costume was a bit too small for him, but he looked cute anyway. He didn't say trick or treat, please, or thank you all night, but he did run from door to door. And if the house had a dog inside he would just walk right on in. This is one kid who is not afraid of dogs or strangers!

A little dry ice and some pumpkins


Dallin eats a candy rat


Natalie abhors change

Natalie cut almost 4 inches off of her hair. You can't tell much from the picture, but she got layers and a "hair style" for the first time in about 15 years we think.

not much of a change, but a fun one