Saturday, June 20, 2009

Happy Dancing and Deeper Thoughts

I'm about a dozen happy dances behind in posting, if I'm keeping true to my reasons for why I post them. Don't know why I post them? I guess I should share that, huh? Originally happy dance postings were my clue to a few friends who were in the loop that I'd had a successful job interview that day, or that there was contact made with a boy I had a crush on. Now I have a full-time job that I enjoy immensely, so thankfully I'm not interviewing anymore. But I do still tend to have a crush on a certain boy, and suddenly, out of the blue, things have moved along swiftly there. So every time he manages to do something that makes me happy, I post a happy dance video, rather than bore everyone with the details of my pathetic love life.

It has been a long and interesting week. There have been ups and downs, just like every week. As well as unexpected challenges, mistakes, and just plain out of the blue circumstances I couldn't control. I said goodbye to my brother who has been staying with me for a month. He left for 3 weeks for more training, and then he'll be back, and then gone, and then back again. There are days where it feels like I'm running a small zoo and bed and breakfast operation around here. I'm not complaining. In fact, I'm enjoying it a lot. (Right now I have a big cat sitting on me, while the tiny cat licks him, and the dog is attempting to lick the uncooperative kitten. Its was only cute the first 5 minutes.)

My mind has been trying to put into words a new feeling I've been having. I'm admittedly a very opinionated and outspoken person. I know that. That being said, I get into very few verbal sparring matches, because I just don't bother to be around people I disagree with frequently. There is one thing I have learned about being opinionated and outspoken- and that is that sometimes it is very hard to keep your opinion to yourself. And other times, it is very hard to be happy when you do keep your opinion to yourself. I'm currently in a situation where it is in my best interest to not argue, or complain, or make my opinion known. Its best to just keep my mouth shut. And I'm about to enter into a new situation where most likely I will need to keep the peace and keep my unwanted thoughts to myself.

I won't lie to you. This is going to be impossible. And painful. And really really difficult. I can keep my mouth shut. Its just going to be really hard to be happy while I keep my opinions to myself. Even though I know it is the right thing to do. 
If I know it is for the best, and that it will keep the peace, why is it stressing me so much in advance? Any advice on how to hold your tongue and be happy while you are biting it?

1 comment:

  1. No advice from me. I'd be no help.
    But I will pay attention to what anyone else says on the subject!!


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