Tuesday, March 30, 2010

True fact

My arms are still very tan from the Haiti trip. A nice lovely light brown color (I do tan up nicely). Today I accidentally spray painted my bare feet brown. And then I put on a chocolate face mask this evening. My dog can't stop staring at me. I wonder if she's disturbed by my pasty white legs?

Monday, March 29, 2010

"Courtship is a time for two people to get acquainted"

I sat in Sacrament Meeting ready and waiting to be edified. A long week had passed and I was ready for an uplifting experience in the form of an Easter talk. The speaker began her talk in the usual way, “When I was asked to give this talk I thought...” and laughed at herself (one of my biggest pet peeves ever- when people start a talk with "when i was asked to give this talk...") Then she said, “So I went to this month's Ensign to see if it had anything interesting. But it was all about getting the singles married off! Ha ha ha! So that wasn't helpful!” And she loudly continued to laugh at her joke.

Sitting there in the middle of the congregation, I mentally tuned her out. I wondered if she knew our ward has over twenty single adults right there in the room? That there are twenty individual households in our ward that the articles, in theory, do apply to. Does she care? Or does she think singles are just a funny little anomaly that need “help” getting “married off?”
Her talk did encourage me to go read the Ensign this month. All I can say is I was sorely disappointed. Not one article even had the hint that they even spoke to a singleton. Yet again, the marrieds know all the answers and can't wait to share them to us helpless, stupid, singles.
The first Ensign article I read “Making Temple Marriage a Priority.” Yet another article with the intent of telling me I should make a Temple Marriage a priority. Well, it is. And that has a lot to do with why I am still single- because I refuse to settle for anything less than a TEMPLE marriage. I think often “non-singles” have this funny idea that singles don't WANT to get married, and so they tell us to make marriage a priority. Newsflash folks, most of us do want to get married. (Sidenote: I actually did find their story sweet and charming. But not real marriage advice.)
The second article, “Making the Marriage Decision,” had me nearly gagging. Young adults about 20-22 years old all talking about the agonizing decision to get married. I can't help it, I have to say it. Maybe they were all right? Maybe they were all too young to get married? Would their lives be so awful if they had all waited to graduate from college, live and experience the real world just a little bit, before committing to one person for all eternity? I'm not suggesting an “eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow we die/get married” mentality. I'm just suggesting that at age 21 it is hard to know who you really are! So how can you possibly know what you really want? I know that at age 35 I am nothing like the girl (and I do mean GIRL, not woman) I was at 21. I wonder how many fewer bankruptcies there would be if the wife had ever had to hold a job, earn money, and be responsible for her own finances? Or if maybe the wife had finished college and had an education that would allow her to get a job during marriage that would bring in a sufficient second income to keep them from financial ruin? Or how many divorces would be avoided by both husband and wife getting to know each other better before they got married?
The third article, “Confidence Tests.” Well, I think if I was still 21 years old and based all my confidence on the number of boys that called me that week, this article would be pertinent. But since I am not 21 years old, and don't care in the least what others think of me, this was another pointless article. I think my favorite “counsel” in this article is, “Courtship is a time for two people to get acquainted.” Really?? That is what we are supposed to be doing???
I found all three articles to be condescending and patronizing, as well as the speaker in church. I don't need baby step instructions on what a date is. (Courtship is a time for two people to get acquainted.) What I want, and what I need, is a decent man (see previous blog post on why I'm looking forward to NOT dating for a while). I want to be treated equally and fairly in church. Can you imagine the backlash if I stood up and said, “This month's articles were all about families, and that is just silly!” Somehow it is okay to make fun of being single, but it isn't okay to make fun of couples that never should have gotten married in the first place??
I don't CHOOSE to be single. I have made a Temple Marriage a priority my entire life. I am just STILL single. Don't tell me to “pray to find a good eternal companion.” Do you really think I haven't been doing that for the last twenty years?

To Date or Not to Date, Often You Never Get to the Question

Tonight as I began packing and organizing for my move I had a funny thought. I sold the cute little white wicker bench that has sat on my front porch since last summer. When I bought it I had a date planned for that weekend. I remember thinking that it would be a fun place to sit after the date, rather than invite him in. I don't recall what happened with the date that weekend. But here is what I do know- I've never sat with a date on that bench.
In fact, I haven't had one date since moving into this house where the guy has picked me up at my house. I've had dates, but not one can fall into the gentleman category. For that matter, I haven't had one date in the past several years where I've invited the guy in. 
To that I say, easy come, easy go. In my three years of dating (or not dating as the case may be) in Utah, I've been sorely unimpressed. I can't say I'll miss it. Most of the men came with a glaring defect and a "take it or leave it" attitude. And in three years, I have met exactly ONE guy that reached my (honestly not that high) standards. All I asked for was that he be active LDS, respectful, interesting/charismatic, single (not divorced or with kids), gainfully employed in such a way as to show pride in himself, and not one to brag about his sins and errors. And if he has a nice smile and good hygiene, all the better. It really doesn't seem so complicated or difficult. But in 3 years of looking, I have found only ONE guy that met those standards. Oh, and he never asked me out. I've gone on plenty of dates with guys missing two or three of those simple attributes, for better or for worse.
Dating in my mid-30s has been an interesting experiment/experience. It is never predictable. The guys I think are sure things turn out to be nothings. The guys I can't find one positive thing to say about and get bored with in 2 seconds ask me out. I have discovered quickly how to separate the men from the "guys." Or how to tell if a divorced father is a good father or not. (If he's not, he doesn't get the time of day from me.)
Recently a man I thought would never speak to me struck up a long email conversation with me. Just as he got me hooked and interested, he disappeared. Nada, nothing, no explanations for why he talked to me, or why he stopped. Another man admitted that for years he had an interest in me, but never got up the guts to do anything about it. I was flattered and showed him interest, and he disappeared. (I guess he got to know me and decided he wasn't interested in what he found?) And then a man (yes, all three qualify as men, not guys) I was was very interested in, and he showed a lot of interest back, but he never did anything about it, asked if we could reschedule a farewell party for me so that he could be there!
I don't get dating anymore. Part of me is looking forward to a new town and new faces. Not that I'm expecting many LDS men around to date there. In fact, I would be surprised if there are any! But I am looking forward to a new and challenging job that I can throw myself into. And in a town with few other distractions, I look forward to spending a lot of time getting creative, and working out. In other words, I look forward to not caring about dating for a good long time. There are a lot more interesting things to do with my life than care about what a man is (or more likely isn't!) thinking!

Shout-Outs to Bloggers I Love

I thought I'd share a few of the blogs I love, and think you should be reading too!

Single Solitary Things by TRS-
TRS is a conservative, charming, Catholic, intelligent and single woman. She is witty and entertaining, and extremely kind and gracious. You don't have to be single to enjoy her style!

Kids are Dang Funny by Jules-
The funny and incomprehensible things children say, as recorded by Jules, enacted by her children.

Beckography by Beck
My friend and neighbor, Becky, was using this blog to showcase her awesome furniture and designs. Her son (my buddy!) was just diagnosed with leukemia this week. She is now chronicling their "new reality" on the blog.

Style Me Pretty
I don't read it because it is wedding stuff. I read it because it is the most beautiful event designs you have ever seen!

From the Trenches of Adoption by Valerie (and Richard)
My two awesome friends who have biological triplets, 2 adopted physical needs boys, and have 2 more physical needs daughters coming home from Bulgaria soon!

Stuckihouse by Ann and Brian
Another old friend of mine, Ann, tells their story as a nomadic opera family. Her husband is an incredibly talented opera singer. They travel the world (Israel and Poland just to name two!) with their two cute toddlers in tow!

Go! Read! Enjoy!

Saturday, March 27, 2010

PTSD - the gift that keeps on giving

I figure I should probably quickly quell any rumors or concerns I may have unintentionally started on Facebook. I put up a simple status update today that I know will ring true with several of my Haiti friends right now. And it probably freaked several other people out.

The status-
Low flying military helicopter overhead shakes my house. I panic. Train rumbles by, shakes my house. I panic. Nice to know my Haiti PTSD is still going strong. Damn earthquakes. (God Bless Haiti)

I appreciated that one of the nurses from our trip made a funny comment about it. (PTSD is a souvenir you didn't have to buy.) For those who don't know what PTSD is, it stands for Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. It is a condition developed after traumatic experiences. Everyone who gets it will get it in their own special way. No two people are the same in how they exhibit it.** 

I've talked to several of my friends from Haiti, and many of us are dealing with our own special cases of PTSD. For the most part it is coming out in nightmares, or for some a tendency to feel guilty when eating, and in one friend's case, a difficult time looking at blood. There have been reports of depression as well. For me, it is a teeny tiny panic attack when my house shakes. And some of the most creative bad dreams I have ever had. In every single dream I have been married to an ex-boyfriend, pregnant, and fighting off some bizarre problem. My favorite one involved my dad riding around my backyard on a pig, while trying to cut its head off with a sword. (The scary part was that I was married to the ex-boyfriend.)

Personally, I think fearing an earthquake is a healthy response! You go spend 3 weeks of your life living in fear of buildings crumbling and seeing overwhelming destruction from an earthquake, not to mention feeling several minor quakes, and see if you don't seize up when your house rumbles! 

So before anyone goes freaking out about my PTSD comment on Facebook, please understand, I'm fine. I know that my fellow Haiti volunteers got the joke, or at the least, feel my pain. We're all still dealing with things in our own special way. Now, if I just didn't have to live next to an Army base and a train track, my life would be a lot calmer! Good thing I am moving soon! (And far away from a fault line!)

**(Please, please, please do not think that what is currently being shown on "Grey's Anatomy" is realistic. If someone, especially a doctor, had symptoms that severe, they would not be working in a hospital, and would be sent to live under careful observation and serious medication.)

Thursday, March 25, 2010

Do What? Due West!

Little and Due West lead singer, Tim Gates

Thank you, Due West, for yet another amazing concert!  Both "Little" and I are loving our new (autographed!) CDs!

My upcoming move has me getting emotional about all sorts of things. This includes anything related to not getting to see "Little" every week, or getting to do all of our favorite traditions together. So when Due West kicked off the show with 'her' song tonight, yes, I cried! I can't tell you how much it means to me, and her, every time they dedicate "22 Hours" to her.

Have you ever wondered if their goodness and kindness to their fans really benefits them? The answer is yes! Many times over yes!  Remember how a long time ago Due West went to Little's elementary school to serenade her with her favorite song? Well, tonight as we walked into the show, Little said, "hey there's a friend from my old elementary school!" and ran over to talk to her. (She's a mighty middle schooler now.) A minute later she told me that her friend had been following Due West ever since that day, (I'm assuming via MySpace) but had never been to a concert, and didn't own a CD. But the kindness of Due West that day so long ago sold 3 tickets to tonight's show (the friend, her mother, and a sister), and at least 1 CD.

I am excited that my new town in Arkansas is only 8 hours from Nashville. I'm looking forward to someday soon getting to go see my favorite band play in Music City, and hanging out with my "Due West Family."

It has been a long time coming but the Due West official debut CD is almost out! You can buy them now at shows, or wait till they "hit the streets" in late April. I LOVE their new and improved sound- very rocking country!! I've been hearing 8 of their songs for about 4 years now, and many of them have been restylized and remastered for this CD. And I'll tell you this- I love the songs more today than ever before! And the new songs?? LOVE THEM ALL!!

If you go to the Due West MySpace page you can hear all of my favorite songs right now! How convenient is that? All my songs in one place right now! Wake Up the Neighbors (I call this the "turn it up some" song), Bible and the Belt (their just announced new single), Tip Jar (brand new and rapidly becoming one of my favorites), Good to be Loved By You (my favorite song for nearly 4 years!), and So Long My Friend (the song that 3 years ago I heard and just hooked me on their style).

Boys, thanks for everything! You can rely on me to always get up and dance at every show!

Tuesday, March 23, 2010


I've accepted a job offer, and I'm moving to Arkansas!
My dad asked me tonight, "Is Fayetteville a suburb of Little Rock?" As you can see, the answer is no. In fact, much to everyone's surprise, there is more to ARK than Little Rock. I will be moving to the Fayetteville/Bentonville area up in NW Arkansas, the home of the world's largest retailer, Wal-mart. Is it a coincidence I'm going to the same town as Wal-mart? Nope! My job is related to Wally World, but no they are not my employer.
I expect to move around April 9, but nothing is set in stone yet.
Details are still coming! Stay tuned...
For some reason tonight I started thinking about the differences in some of the guys that I have dated, and about some of their similarities. For those who don't know, I have a type. A very distinct type. A type so predictable that my best friend can predict whether or not I will be interested in a guy just from hearing his description. She usually knows before I do if I'm going to be interested. I'm that consistent.
So just for fun, I thought I'd share some of the funny quirks I've learned about the different types. For the record, I've dated two or more guys in each category.

Architects/Civil Engineers- They will doodle on anything and everything. Take them to dinner, go home with a personalized drawing on a napkin. And it doesn't have to be a paper napkin.

Pilots- Eventually, you will have a discussion about their motorcycles, or favorite vehicles. And they all believe that the flight attendants want them.

Friday, March 19, 2010

Fine- be that way!

Have you heard the saying, "Everything will turn out fine in the end. If everything isn't fine, it isn't the end." For a long time I didn't agree with that saying. (I don't agree with a lot of cliches, sayings, or "glittering generalities." I think they give people too much encouragement to be a lemming, or not be an individual.) Sometimes things do have a crappy ending. Sometimes things just don't turn out the way we want. But lately I guess I've lived enough to accept that you can be fine with accepting the crappy ending. Ordeals and trials stop being a trial when you can accept it and be fine with it.
You may have noticed my blog has a new header picture (i've included it in this post for my RSS reading friends). It isn't the greatest quality, but I love it anyway. I took it on our last day in-country in Haiti. Right there in the middle of Hell on Earth, there was a beautiful beach. After all, Haiti is a tropical Caribbean island. (For the first few days in-country every time I heard someone say "Port au Prince" I would think of the Beach Boys' "Kokomo" song. After a few more days of living in Hell, I no longer associated a tropical island song with Haiti.) This picture makes me think "If everything isn't fine, it isn't the end." Even in the middle of Hell on Earth, you can find beauty. It made me mad to find something so perfect and beautiful in the middle of devastation. Empty hotel rooms with a working restaurant, and they aren't sharing it with their homeless brothers and sisters?? But what can I do about it?
For me this picture represents how I feel about becoming fine with the end. You don't have to love it. You don't have to be happy about it. You just have to accept it and be fine with it.

Pregnant Pause, or My Life in Escrow

If there was a way for a person's life to be in escrow, my life would be described as in escrow right now. Big news coming soon.

Monday, March 15, 2010

The GOOD WEEK Challenge

I've put this on Twitter, Facebook, LDSLinkup, and now I'm putting it on the blog! Let's make this a real thing!

No matter what crap gets thrown your way, you take the challenge to have a positive attitude, keep calm, carry on, smile, and go forth.  

I like to play this game when I know I potentially have a crappy week ahead of me. And trust me, this week has potential to really suck, or really be great.... And who knows what will get thrown at me. So I am taking the GOOD WEEK CHALLENGE. No matter what happens, it is going to be a GOOD WEEK!! 

Who's with me?!

You Never Know Who is Watching

Today I was substitute teaching the CTR4 class in Primary (this would be the 4-5 year old Sunday School class to the non-LDS). I have a "4 yr old boyfriend" in that class, as well as a few little girls that call me "fairy godmother." I like to call them my little 4 year old fan club. It's not every day that a single woman with no kids gets to have a 4 yr old fan club. I love them!
Our lesson was on How to Be Like Jesus. I asked each child to give me an example of how to be like Jesus. My little boyfriend raised his hand and said, "We can be like our Erin Ann who went to Haiti to help the little babies who got sick after the earthquake." {long sidenote as he demonstrates an earthquake} "Because Erin Ann wants to be like Jesus and to take care of all the little children and love everyone."
Needless to say, I cried (and laughed, because it wouldn't be a 4 yr old boy if he didn't demonstrate an earthquake in the middle). And I'm feeling just a little bit more pressure to set a good example for my 4 yr old fan club.

Friday, March 12, 2010

Happy Dance Day!!

It has been one heckuva long time since the last time I posted a HAPPY DANCE!!!
I thought today's happy dance pick of Jai Ho, as performed by @rachelhagen and @mickhagen was perfect. First, I love the meaning behind Jai Ho (victory to thee!). Second, it seems appropriate that the little victory or happy thing in my head that I am celebrating is social media/career related, and Rachel and Mick are two people that really "get" it! And while I am at it, let me plug Rachel's Elegance Redefined decorating and design blog, and Mick's company Zinch.com. I "met" this couple via social media, which makes this post today that much more appropriate!
Lots of good things happening today! Let's all do a happy dance!!

Now, if you'll excuse me, my favorite 4 year old has just knocked on the door and wants me to come play "flips" with her. (Where I through her through the air until we are both completely nauseated.) I can't think of a better way to spend the afternoon!

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Stay Classy, Interwebz

I am no better than a dog turning to its own poop. If you don't know that reference, go re-read the Old Testament.
Today I got an email from an online dating site I was on forever ago. But because I no longer pay for the site the email didn't tell me who had sent me a message. All I knew was that someone had. Being bored and having nothing better to do with my time, I went to the site, went through the 20 steps to figure out my password again, and finally logged in. Not being a paying member all I could really do was look to see who had viewed my profile recently, and maybe narrow it down to see who wrote me. (In other words, I looked at the viewers to see if there was anyone interesting enough that I would want to read an email from them.) I saw that a guy I was friends with years ago on that site had recently taken a peak. Thinking optimistically that maybe he had written me, I forked over the $9 to access the emails. (If you only knew how many people from my past have resurfaced lately, you wouldn't think that so unusual.)
I was wrong. It wasn't the guy I had hoped for. But I did have plenty of emails waiting for me from random online men. (I haven't checked this site in months, maybe years?) I glanced over them and saw nothing interesting. But within a few moments of being online someone IM'ed me via the site.
(Personally, I think that is just rude. I think you should send the person an email first before IM'ing them, but since I'm not Miss Manners and I don't rule the world, there is little I can do to enforce that rule.)
The guy looked innocuous enough, so we began chatting.
I kid you not, within 2 minutes of "Hi, wanna chat?" he was making disgusting sexual overtures and offensive comments.
And then I remembered exactly why it is I stopped using such sites, and clicked off the site.
So ladies, and the occasional gentlemen who read this site, cut me a break when maybe sometimes I make odd dating decisions. When I let ex's back in from the past, or go on dates with guys I'm not that into (but find nothing wrong with), or decide I'd rather Facebook all night and not go to parties, be patient with me. Some days it honestly it feels like there are no other, decent, new, worthy fish in the sea. I haven't give up hope yet, but I swear that day is rapidly coming.

Tuesday, March 09, 2010

As the World Turns


Today was one of THOSE days in the unemployment world of things. No follow up calls, no great leads, no rejections, no nothing. I started off the day excited and motivated, and I'm ending the day frustrated. I'm a planner, an organizer, a girl with a dream! I like the unknown, because I like organizing and daydreaming about it. But when I have no idea what the future holds, it is really hard to stay positive. 

Have I mentioned here that my parents are about to move to Saudi Arabia? Well, they are. My parents who have barely ever traveled anywhere outside the US, are moving to the Middle East. I spent some time today looking up flights and hotels for my mom and sister to fly to Riyadh, with a fun stopover in London. I'm so jealous! I love England! Just thinking of all the things they get to do has me green with envy. There are 2 things I am sure of right now- I either need to find a job "oconus" (out of the continental US), or a job that pays well enough that I can go "oconus" often!

And so the question persists, where will I land when this ride is over? What city, state, country or continent will I end up in? And when, pray tell, will I get off this crazy ride?!

Sunday, March 07, 2010

Haiti photos and the Super Bowl Story

Friday night I went to a photo exhibit benefiting Healing Hands for Haiti, the organization we worked with in Haiti. The photos were taken by "Dr Joel," one of the guys on our trip. He's both a photographer and an M.D., how cool is that? A few photos were also contributed by Misha Tulek, an LDS Church member from NYC that spotted our group in Haiti, and joined up and stayed with us a few days. The photography was incredible and brought back some very powerful images and feelings about Haiti for me.
It was also a lot of fun to join up with several Haiti friends and go out for a mini-reunion of sorts. One of our awesome nurses, Kim, is leaving to serve a mission for the LDS Church in Hungary next week. We wanted to get together before she left. It was fun to be with so many wonderful friends again. The communications student in me had fun watching the interpersonal communications in the group. We were all so used to being in a close physical proximity to each other, and that seems to have carried over. Personal space? Invaded! And yet, while standing so close, we're asking each other simple get to know you questions. We shared very intense emotions and experiences in Haiti, but didn't learn much about "real world" stuff. So this was a great evening of laughing, sharing memories, and actually getting to know each other. I haven't laughed or smiled so much in one evening in a long time. It really was great to spend time with Haiti friends who just get it!
*Sidenote* We had dinner at ACME Burger in SLC. I have been there before and have enjoyed the food and great service. When I called to set up the reservation for 20 they asked for a credit card. No big deal. But unfortunately we only had 10 show up. Not like we could control who didn't show, right? Well, the restaurant wasn't that busy. No line or people waiting, and plenty of empty tables. Once we were sure that our group was final, we released the extra tables from our reservation. Then when our bills came the restaurant had tacked on a $10 charge to each bill for the incomplete party of 20. I just think that is rude. And in spite of how much I used to like them, I won't be going back again.

Now for the Super Bowl in Haiti story. I've been waiting till I could get a picture of that night before I tell you the story. And now I have one, so here goes. (I stole said picture from someone's facebook page. But now I can't remember who!)

Basically it goes like this. As you have heard by now we were camped out in a soccer field with the US Army 82nd Airborne division, Golf battery. (I had to say that a lot while we were there.) We wanted to be able to thank them appropriately, but were very limited in how to thank them. They can't take gifts, money, etc. They are just the US Army doing their jobs. But someone within our group came up with a brilliant plan. It involved flying in reps from Direct TV (from Puerto Rico, I believe) into the Dominican Republic, bussed into Haiti, to set up a satellite dish for us. After all, we were in a professional sports field and had a big blank white scoreboard to use as the perfect screen. We (and by we I mean someone that wasn't me, but some awesome guys in our camp) bought American brand chips and sodas and ice (oh how we love "glace"). There were even some friendly football games between our guys and the Army guys held in the field.
When game time came, we all grabbed our sleeping mats and bug spray, and gathered round the big screen- Task Force and Army alike! We watched the Super Bowl together right there in our little field. It was truly one of the most memorable, and by far enjoyable, nights of the trip. We had a great respect for each other already. It was a really wonderful experience to get to relax side by side with them. There were a few friendly wagers placed on the game. And a bullhorn or two used to cheer on a favorite side. Oh and let's not forget Dan Merino giving our soldiers a shout out on the air!
But for me the best part of the entire night was hearing the National Anthem in a field in Haiti with US Air Force C-130's and US Navy helicopters flying overhead, while US soldiers all stood at attention, saluting the flag on the screen. It brought tears to my eyes then, and it brings tears to my eyes now. At that moment, like no other in my life, I was grateful for the US Military. Still am, and always will be.
It was a great night and a lot of fun, even if I did fall asleep more than once! (it was a very late night for all of us who were used to going to bed when the sun went down!) And hands-down the best Super Bowl viewing party ever.
It almost doesn't seem real that just a few weeks ago I was living in a tent in a soccer field in Haiti. I look at the pictures and it feels like a very vivid dream. Seeing my counterparts again made it all feel real again, and brought back the emotions I knew so well. I shared something very intense, awful, and personal with one person. For the first time we acknowledged it to each other. Just to be able to look at that person and know I'm not alone in what I felt meant so much to me. Haiti will always have a very special place in my heart, as will the volunteers I shared it with.

Thursday, March 04, 2010

Bring on the Options!

I love being able to look to the future and knowing I have options. All too often while unemployed it feels like there are no options. In the last few days I have entertained all sorts of ideas and options for the future. And let me tell you, while it is all good, it is also overwhelming!

what i looked like the last time i was considering graduate school
(that little girl i'm holding is my sister stephanie- she's now in college) 

Here is a quick glimpse into the hurricane that is my mind these days-

  • MBA in Social Entrepreneurship
  • at Oxford?
  • or somewhere else?
  • Who are we kidding? I'll never get into Oxford! But a girl can dream!
  • Job interviews!
  • Job applications
  • Adopting from Haiti
  • Foster care
  • online courses from Oxford in Globalization
  • retaking 2 college classes
  • Let's be honest, I'm 35. Am I going to feel over the hill going back to college?
  • I'm afraid to think about the whole career vs marriage thing. Will a 35 yo LDS, American woman ever get married if she goes to England for school? What if she moves to Arkansas? 
  • Life is stressful enough trying to fight Arkansas and England out in my head! (And all of the other places I've applied to jobs.)
  • Seriously, am I about to completely send my social life to the electric chair??
  • Talk about insanity, I'm on the verge of becoming that intimidating woman I never thought was possible- published author, adoptive mother, international hobbies, high powered career. Or am I about to become the man I have always wanted to find?
  • Speaking of my social life, the book launch party on Saturday night- what to wear? Do I go cute or sexy? 
  • I don't pull sexy off very well!
  • I could mention the other place I'm going where I am hoping to run into my crush, but there's a chance he reads this. So I do I say it? Or not?
  • how on earth can I pull off a great job, going back to school, and adopting all at the same time?
  • adopt first? or go back to school first?
  • is it possible for my dog to demand to go outside anymore today??
  • I really need a better retirement plan. My winning the lottery strategy hasn't worked so far.
  • Starting tomorrow I'm doing "monopoly money stock market investing"
  • The Congo- yes, the Congo. I'm doing a lot of research right now on the Congo for a novel I am co-writing. 
  • Speaking of which, I just thought up a fun new idea for the book. I should go write it down.
  • I had a phone interview today with a company that wanted 10 years experience, with minimum 5 years management, plus a BA, MBA preferable. And it paid $35K. Do you know that my first job out of college with zero experience 12 years ago paid $30K? Are these people crazy?!
  • 4 incredibly talented, hard-working friends got laid off from their jobs in the past week. I don't really believe the job climate is improving!
  • I miss Haiti. I just want to go back to Haiti and hold babies all day. Why can't that be my life's plan?
  • You know what isn't fair? That the girl who has been boy-crazy and had all of her babies named since she was 10 years old is still single. 
  • I applied for 5 great, amazing, dream job opportunities this past week. Will my phone ever ring?
  • I have easily 20, maybe 30, bags of donations from friends to send to Haiti. But no local charities are accepting them. Maybe it is time for me to set up my own 501(c)3 and do it myself? That would be a ton of work, but I'm for the challenge. 

That's enough for one day. I have a lot to go think about.

Tuesday, March 02, 2010

One Heart in the Right Place

 one of my favorite little girls in the pediatrics tent at general hospital

This morning I had the chance to speak to a group of students at BYU regarding my Haiti experiences. I brought along my favorite translator, Neil, to help me out. These students are working on a plan to go to Haiti this summer to make a difference doing things from "holding babies" to "enabling the Haitians." Their faculty adviser, Prof Woodworth, asked Neil and I to be counselors of sorts to the group. And Neil and I are both hoping to possibly join them when they go down to help. If you are looking to make a difference or to help in Haiti, please support this group! You can find them at Sustain Haiti on Facebook or their blog at http://sustainhaiti.blogspot.com

Also, if you haven't already, check out my guest post for therhouse adoption advocacy blog today!

Monday, March 01, 2010

Good Friends, Good Weekend

I had a good weekend with good friends. Friday night I went out for the annual go-kart races for the birthdays of several friends. (See the pic of me in my race suit in the side bar.) Go-kart racing is always a ton of fun. I highly recommend it. But fair warning- after racing around the track all night, sometimes it can be really hard to remember to drive sanely on the freeway on the way home. Also, try to withstand the urge to tailspin into your own driveway. Just saying.
Saturday night I stayed up with my brother, Allyson, and our new housemate Rex and played Settlers into the wee hours of the night. (Made all the more perplexing when I thought I was going to win in the next round so I took a sleeping pill, and then we played for another 30 minutes. I was having trouble remembering what color I was, but I still won!)
Tonight I joined Heidi, Dave, Sara, Oliver, Kristen, Evelyn (Heidi's mom), and all of their collective offspring for an Indian dinner. Their collective offspring call me "Fairy Godmudder," which never gets old. Baby Maya continues to be the cutest baby ever, and will continue to be so until a cuter, younger model comes to take her place. But since none of my close friends are currently pregnant, I think Baby Maya makes a great Reigning Baby. (Maybe this is a sign I need to have a baby someday?)
You know what I like about my friends? I never feel like a third wheel or the odd man out. Now maybe if they did make me feel like that more often I'd actually try to date more. But since they don't, I'm always happy to enjoy their company without the pressures of a date.
There is a lot going on this upcoming week! I'm a guest blogger over at therhouse adoption blog. The Big Alliance is hosting our first ever young leaders breakfast lecture series. Want to hear the owner of Papa Johns talk about success and business? It's only $10 and that includes an awesome breakfast! There is a fundraiser photo exhibit on Friday by my photographer friends from Haiti that promises to be mind-blowingly awesome. (Followed by an awesome reunion dinner with Haiti friends! I can't wait!) I have a job interview for a big deal job this week! Cross your fingers and say some prayers! And last but not least, on Saturday night we are finally launching the Don't Forget the Pepper Spray book! I'm so excited to finally get the book out!
What a great way to start off a big week!

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