Friday, April 29, 2011

Funny Kid Quote of the Day

Today rocked. Did I mention that yet? Because seriously people, I wish I could tell you more, but it was just plain awesome for a million different reasons.
One of those reasons? The following conversation.
I had driven up to see my cousin Karlee and her 3 kids for the evening (and to celebrate the awesomeness of the day).
This little dude is Keith-

As can be the case in our family, understanding the differences between cousins, aunts, uncles, and friends, can be very confusing. (Our generations overlap considerably.) Keithy asked several times who I was. We finally agreed I am not his uncle, because those are boys, and that maybe I am Queen Zerin of all the Land.
He asked me where I live. I said, "In your grandma's basement." (Which is partially true. I move there this weekend, and that is where he has most recently seen me.)

Did I mention I was wearing this shirt?

It was my favorite H&M shirt. Kind of fun, lightweight, with big bold stripes. I thought it was cute. Now I want to burn it.

During dinner I went outside for a sec to grab something. When I came back in, Keith asked his mother, "Mom, where did Grandma's prisoner go?!"

(Later that night Keith asked, "Mom, is Erin Ann REALLY the Queen of all the Land?" Being a wise woman, she answered, "Yes, she's Queen Zerin.")

(Maybe back in college when my aunt was naming her baby, Karlee and I sent her a list of names that were a combination of our own names for her to consider. Queen ZerinannKarma was our favorite. Let's just say Remington dodged a bullet on that one.)

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Worst ad in a very long time

I can't be the only girl who looked at this ad and thought, "Is that a...? And you want to give me one more free night of that? No thank you!"
I'm pretty sure they mean for it to be a feather, maybe? I really can't tell. All I can see is a tamp0n. And no, I don't want to reserve one for the weekend.

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Voice to Text Translation

By now everyone has heard of Da*n You Auto Correct, right? Well it is time someone started a sister site for voicemail to text translation fails!!
Both my parents and I have this little service on our phones. Today my dad sent me this gem of the text version of a voicemail I left him- 
"Hi I was trying to tell you that I finally booked my flight to Salt Lake. I'm laughing because I booked them out of place price lines of course they told her you know multiple airport they could take me out of it when it birds and hang out of Dallas. It was ridiculously expensive and I couldn't get a flight so I booked it yet was like alright we'll just try my life and see what happened if I stay out of round up in Charlottesville Lynchburgand all that and it took me out of Charlottesville. I live in Charlottesville, Dallas and Dallas nonstop in Salt Lake which actually think about it think about it. The return flight in Salt Lake to Dallas nonstop and then I booked four hours a way over at Dallas vote for my return flight to salt to Charlottesville. I can show it so tell to go in effect minute. Anyway, kind of funny if you think about it. Four hour lay over in Dallas for the 2 Hour Dr. to me.

Which is funny and all, but it doesn't hold a candle to this one left by who knows who on my voicemail this week- 
In. It's like air and pricing off the phone with a neophyte my name very this toll free number 88888971% Nell that's. So yeah man, it's not this. It was the call. Thank you. He

But my favorite is a message my sister left me this week-
Oh hey Aaron Scott you shot Paul. Oh my it. I'm I'm on my way to Warren off there and I've got windows down, but any area until later and then it wouldn't let me answer row I guess I'll talk to you manager. Bye. 

This is why I don't do voicemail, people. Send me a text!!

Up and Adam

Kaya is also tired of waiting for everything to happen! She refuses to get out of bed till we have answers!

Today should finally be the day, kids! We're THISCLOSE to several major things in my life finally resolving and coming to what just might be a happy ending! THISCLOSE!!
There is also a chance that everything is one breath away from falling apart. And we don't want that. We do not want to have to start all over again and rebuild!!
I'll be holding my breath all day waiting for the magic to happen. You just keep your fingers, toes, and other appendages cross, okay?
I swear if there is another delay in everything resolving today I may throw a fit and pee my pants. And that wouldn't be pretty!! So I'm going to get up, run my morning two miles, tame my crazy humidity hair into submission, and then go make all the crazy things happen that NEED TO HAPPEN TODAY! Do you hear me, Universe?? TODAY WE MAKE IT HAPPEN!! No more silly delays!!

In the meantime, while we all wait with baited breath for me to actually explain the current situation, I give you links and other things to check out-

Soccer fans- my Real Salt Lake blog has new video and posts up. And as tomorrow night grows closer, I'll keep posting more fun stuff! Check it out! (Also, I'm talking with one of the players to write a blog post for me!!)

My green aware friends- Cutting Back and Going Green has lots of new posts and some interesting news stories up!

If you haven't yet discovered the music player on "littlelover" you are missing out. Warning: highly addictive and sounds like whale sounds! (You click on the board to play music.)

I've updated the Erin Store!! There's a few new great deals up on there!

And last but not least, BYU alum in Virginia-

We are getting close, but still need 90 BYU fans with registered
vehicles in Virginia who are willing to purchase a logo license plate.
The Virginia DMV requires 350 in order to produce them.
Questions, contact David Svir, 

Monday, April 25, 2011

Due West Encore!

You know what we haven't seen on this blog in a very long time??

And that, my friends, is a crying shame!
Sadly, it has all been a case of logistics. They perform all over the US these days, but I still manage to live in a "small, small town" that just doesn't attract a lot of awesome bands!
So this weekend I packed up the dogs and my little sister and we drove down to Asheville, North Carolina to see my favorite country trio! After years of taking my "Little Sister" (known to all you blog readers as "Little") to see Due West, it was time to take my actual little sister to see the band. Just for nostalgia, let's bring out an old photo-

This picture was taken at Little's elementary school. Due West came over and serenaded her at lunch- making her pretty much the happiest kid ever. Also, completely ensuring that both she and I would be loyal fans for life! (Also, Matt- love the beard and long hair! I had forgotten that look!) (I cannot believe what a little girl is Little is here! Suddenly I'm realizing just how much she has grown up over the past few years!!)

Did you know I've been friends with DW for about 5 years now?? Crazy. I have loved watching them grow and change both as men and as a band. It has been a fun ride!

As usual, the show was fantastic. They played at a bar in downtown Asheville (a town I fell in love with just by driving through). My sister, Steph, loved the band and told me multiple times how nice and fun the guys were. I LOVED LOVED LOVED the new music (seriously guys- release "Leaving" as your next single!! PLEASE!!) (also, please put it on MySpace!)  If you have not yet been introduced to the awesomeness of DW music check them out on MySpace!
(my favorite songs on the current place list are "County Fair," "Wake Up the Neighbors," - the perfect song to give you a kick in the pants and get you out of bed in the morning! and "Bible and the Belt.")

I had a great time on my first official road trip with my baby sister. We had lots of sister-girl-bonding time! 
Erin and Steph

(Yes, my baby sister is 4 inches taller than me. And I was even wearing tall heels!)

Thanks Due West for another great night!! It was a blast seeing you again. Let's do it again soon! In Roanoke!

Due West
Hanging out with Due West

Discount on Mother's Day Flowers

Another great offer from CityDeals!
Get $40 worth of Mother's Day flowers for just $18! Delivers nationally!

Rules of the Deal
- Enter the redemption code at checkout
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- Expires 10/31/2011

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Hey Ladies! Mani/Pedi for $15

Hey Ladies! Who wants a mani pedi for just $15? CityDeals is running a 50% off promotion (usually $30) for the Forum at Accademia in American Fork, Utah!
To my non-Utah friends, I promise that one of these days I will find better deals to share outside of Utah!!

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Introducing the Erin Store(s)

"Sale? Did someone say sale?? I will take you to the sale!"

As you may have noticed, I have several different websites that I run! Today I am excited to introduce my new "stores" on each site.

Here on The Story of a Nice Mormon Girl I'm calling my new venture the Erin Store. I'll be sharing deals I've found online, and things I love! Like shoes, chocolate, travel, and more.

Over at my Cutting Back and Going Green blog you can find organic, healthy, and cost saving deals .

And don't forget Jobs By Erin! I've introduced a few new products to help individuals with their job hunting. (In addition to all of the jobs I've been posting lately!)

My new baby, Footballer Fan Girl, doesn't have a store up- yet. I'm having very strange problems with HTML and embedding images and video on that page. But it is taking shape slowly but surely. If you are a soccer fan, especially if you are an RSL fan, you are welcome to guest blog or share pictures on there!!

Have fun shopping, and I'll update them soon!


Monday, April 18, 2011

Believing in me, defining me

I also love eating chocolate, painting my nails (they are ALWAYS painted), and wearing ball caps.

Who we are can be defined by so many different things. And how other people define us can be based on so many other things. But at the end of the day it is what we believe about ourselves that defines who we truly are.
Recently, and for obvious reasons, many people have tried to define me as someone who defines herself by her marital status.
This statement is fascinating to me. First, other people are defining me, by what they think I define myself as. Those people would be wrong twice.
I don't define myself by my single status. Sure, it is something that I write about, and talk about a lot. But talking about the LDS singles situation no more defines what I think of myself, than being a writer about frogs would define me as a woman who believes she is a frog!
Are you following me?
Sure, I have a lot to say on the subject. But it doesn't define who I am.
What I believe in myself is that I am dedicated to service. I lok for new ways to serve people each and every day. I pray for opportunities to serveothers every day. I feel terrible when I am forced to turn down a chance to do a favor or lend a hand ot others. Service is what defines me.
I am the daughter of Maurice and Alicia.
I am the sister of Scott, Steph, and Natalie.
I am the sister-in-law of Steve.
I am the aunt of Porter, Dallin, and Tell.
I am the fairy godmother to 10 little children, several of whom believe I wear sparkly slippers and carry a fancy wand around.
I am a cousin to over 50 people. And I can name them all in age order.
I am "Little's" big sister. I am also her confidante. She is my muse.
I am Emilee's "giant sister."
I am the human to one incredibly awesome dog (even when she does hog the bed).
I am the ex-girlfriend to a few good men.
I am a friend to several many more wonderful people.
I was an angel to a woman dying in a hospital bed in Haiti. She held my hand as she died and whispered over and over that I was an angel.
I am a niece and a grand-daughter.

I am a singer.
I am a writer.
I am a science fiction nerd.
I get addicted to well-written stories, whether they be books, movies, or TV series.
I love goofball and corny humor. I hate potty humor.
I will find something to love in everyone I meet, and give them the benefit of the doubt, no matter how much they have wronged me, or how annoying they are.
I'm a motivator and instigator. And on occasion I like to call myself a "muckraker," after my now deceased cousin and journalist Jack Anderson.
I am not afraid to make tough choices.
I am not afraid to do the unexpected. In fact, I live for it.
I am not afraid to rock the boat and make people think about uncomfortable things, or ask the hard questions.
I am someone to many people. It is not the lack of one specific person in my life that defines me.
I define me. I determine what I will be and what my destiny. Not what others think about me. And certainly not my marital status. 

Saturday, April 16, 2011

Daydreaming about the Peace Corps

I turned in my Peace Corps medical application 8 weeks ago, and since then I have done my very best to not think about the PC. Considering the prior 7 months to this I have thought non-stop about the Peace Corps, this was a major effort for me. But I may dare say that there were even a few days in the past few weeks where I didn't think about PC at all.
My medical packet is turned in, and it is all out of my hands now. I have 3 very small medical issues which may require a great deal of follow up medical work to get me cleared. Two of which, rumor has it, they often ask someone to wait a full year to prove their health, and then have him/her reapply. I've made up my mind that if asked to do additional medical work to get cleared, I will do it. However, if I am asked to wait a year, I will most likely not continue to pursue this course. At my age, and considering I've already spent a year not doing anything useful really, I just don't think it would be prudent.
For the past few months I have befriended some of the current volunteers in Morocco (which, as you may recall, is where I expect to get sent- no guarantees though!). The newest batch of recruits left for MOR about 5 weeks ago, and I have heard little from them since. However, today they must have all found internet access at once! Facebook had plenty of updates and new pictures to reignite my thoughts and daydreams about the PC.
There's just a few more days or weeks to endure before I find out if I passed the medical portion. I checked in with them on Thursday and was assured my packet would be getting reviewed in the next 2-3, maybe 4 weeks. And then, finally, hopefully, "in-shallah," my future will be a little less hazy!
As I weigh my future options, nothing holds a candle to the Peace Corps. This is the option I want more than anything else. I know there are some who are questioning why I would want to go live in a less-developed country for two years for no pay. To them all I can say is, why wouldn't I want to go serve and help others and live another culture for two years? It's just who I am. I would much rather work in a hot, dusty, desert country teaching business skills than working in a cubicle, staring at a screen all day. Make a difference? Work for the man? Yeah, I know which option I'd rather take. (But I'm not so blind as to not understand the importance of maybe having to do the other one.)
I hereby give myself permission to start daydreaming about the Peace Corps again. I know it means that if I get rejected it will break my heart. But it also means I'll be thrilled that much more if I get in. I vote for thrills and happiness!

Looking for a Mother's Day or Easter gift idea?

May I humbly suggest chocolate? The Dark Chocolate Indulgence and More Chocolate Gifts at
I just discovered today. May I say I am in love?
And I'm so nice I got you a discount code. 15% Off Select Gifts at With Code GIFT15!

Friday, April 15, 2011

CityDeals Stimulus Package!

CityDeals is running a special today! (FRIDAY!) Save an extra 15% off most deals on the site (exclusions clearly marked)! Use coupon code STIMULUS! 

Thursday, April 14, 2011

If you were waiting for a sign...

Oh I'm waiting for a sign alright. I'm waiting for a big huge brick to come and hit me over the head, preferably with a note attached to it spelling out exactly what I am supposed to do next.
There are times there is so much going on that a brick hitting me in the head would only be that- a brick to the head. I still wouldn't know what that means, except not to stand in that one place much longer!
Just be patient with me folks. Let's just give life a few weeks longer to settle down and play out. 

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Quote of the Day

Quote of the Day:
How many people can say going to live in a hut in Africa is the more logical choice?

Favorite Conversation with Lexi:
(I was wearing my completely foxy and awesome "4 Little Ponies of the Apocalypse" t-shirt. As you can see in the image above of the shirt, one of the ponies is wearing an eyepatch.)
Lexi (age 5): Erin Ann, are you wearing a pirate ponies shirt?
Me: No, I'm wearing the little ponies of the apocalypse.
Lexi gives me a classic "WTF" look.
Lexi: No. I think you are wearing pirate ponies. That just makes more sense.

Monday, April 11, 2011

Like it!

Want to do me a favor? Click this very safe link that goes to Facebook, and vote for the cutest, funniest picture of my adorable nephew ever. If my photo wins (and if you are all good friends and readers, my picture will win), I have promised the mother of the adorable boy in the picture that I will give her the prize. And she's had a very bad week and deserves a prize. So help my sister out my "liking" her funny little boy!
Again you just have to click here-
Then "like" the page "Josh Loves It"
Then "like" the picture of Porter and his trusty mate Ruby.

Balancing immediate needs against long term goals

For the past year my life has been a constant struggle and test in how to balance short term or immediate needs with long term desires and goals. There are some days where it just doesn't seem possible to balance them out because one is more demanding than the other. And then there is the balancing act of other people's opinions on which one should get more attention, and how to respond to those people when I make a choice that doesn't agree with them.
This week, more than most weeks, I have to find that happy medium, and balance long and short term goals. Or maybe there won't be a happy medium? Maybe trying to compromise the two things will mean jeopardizing my opportunities?
I am grateful to be the kind of person who can see both long and short term. I find I even struggle to get along with people who can't see both pictures. (Especially when the picture is of my own life.) (Or worse, when the person can't see beyond their one role in the bigger picture.)
But it is what it is- a balancing act. A test of patience, endurance, understanding, and clarity. A refining test of faith and trust.
So be patient with me friends and family as I make important decisions this week. I know that every major choice ahead of me this week affects both my long and short term needs. I have faith that I've made the right choices in the past, put the right wheels in motion, and have done my best to reach both goals.
Now it is time to just wait and see what will happen.

Thursday, April 07, 2011

Taxes, debt, and other words I hate

Do you ever look at the fighting in politics, "in Washington," (as a DC native, there is no phrase I hate more than "in Washington"), etc and think of better solutions to the problem?
For instance, taxes and the national debt situation.
Have you ever noticed how at the end of doing your federal taxes there is a spot you can select to send $3 to the presidential election fund? (which really, I think is entirely worthless and stupid, but that's a point for another day). Why don't we add a box to select to send $3 (or however much you want to voluntarily donate) to the national debt?
We could even make it fancier. Set up a national trust for donations to the national debt, and make the donations tax exempt? How many people would donate a few dollars, or maybe even more, to help solve the debt crisis?
If we really want to return the government to the people, why not let the people actually help solve the problems? A balanced budget, plus donated funds? Magic, I say!
Or is that just too libertarian of me to think letting people truly govern themselves is a good thing?

Wednesday, April 06, 2011

Calling all LDS Singles- I want your input

Over the weekend during LDS General Conference the call was issued loud and clear that men (and women) should not put off getting married. To read more about what was specifically said you can check out my Meridian Single Thought column, "Get Married Now!" Consider what I am about to say as the unofficial follow up to what I said in my column (which was written on Sunday night just hours after conference ended).
The thoughts going through my head right now are similar to when the president of a company comes into the meeting and says, "Make this happen!" and walks out. The team can sit around and complain and moan about how he made a directive but didn't provide any directions or leadership. Or they can embrace it, form a plan, and make it happen.
In the few days since the conference, all I have heard is the complaining and moaning. From the men it is mostly complaining about how the women don't want them, or don't like them, etc. And from the women I'm mostly hearing how they want to get married, but can't find any men. And vice versa in many cases.
What I haven't heard is one person say how they are going to change their actions and make something happen. And we need something to happen- at the congregational level, regional, church-wide, and personal levels.
What I am hoping for is that in the next few weeks we will hear that the Church has a new policy or program in store for the singles. But until that actually happens, I want to hear it from you!
How do we go about "making this happen?" President Monson- has literally issued the call "to make something happen"- for singles to get married. Now- how do we change things to make that a better possibility?
I'll go ahead and say this right now. The current system doesn't work. The singles program of the Church is not working. There needs to be change from the top levels all the way down to individual attitudes and activities. I've written multiple columns about what works and doesn't work, and why I think those things are, so I won't rehash those topics here.
But I want to know- Singles- what do you want? What would help you? (And please, for the love, do not give me "i want to be asked out" or "women don't like me" answers. Give me CONSTRUCTIVE answers.)
To prime the pump-
More activities?
A better communications program to share activities?
Classes on communication?
Classes on how to recover from divorce?
A physical makeover class?
Critical analysis from a professional on what you do or don't do right? (I've secretly always wanted to do this.)
More conferences?
More parties?

What? What would help you be able to -
1. meet more people
2. date more people
3. get over issues related to avoiding marriage/commitment

I'm only adding this picture because I find it hilarious. Not because I find it true.

(In case you don't get the joke. This was a real "photobomb" during conference Sunday. In the last few minutes of the last session, this kid just popped into view for a second. If you blinked, you missed it. But thankfully we all have DVRs for the playback!)

How I attempt to balance working, unemployment, volunteering, ADD, and a creative personality

Why this picture? I'll tell you why this picture. A) I am far more creative by moving water (completely true and verifiable fact), and B) I'm ADD and it just made sense to me at the time.

This new little life I lead of unemployment/self-employment is completely contradictory to everything that comes naturally to me. This life requires an insane amount of self-discipline that I am not naturally prone to. Not to mention, attention to details, follow up, and other things I've already managed to forget since the idea to write this post hit me.
To clear up the confusion about my working status. I am still technically unemployed. I am still actively looking for a job. I am also still an actively waiting impatiently Peace Corps nominee. I am also attempting to earn money in a side job that is sometimes more effective than others. Not to mention, I am bound and determined to finish writing a book before I do get a job/leave for the Peace Corps/make another crazy change in my life.
To balance the multiple priorities in my life (looking for a job, attempting self-employment, be creative, volunteer work), I have divided my week up accordingly. Two days a week I focus on the self-employment part. Two days a week I focus solely on job hunting. One day- Wednesday- I attempt to allow myself to just be creative all day. (More on that later.) Saturdays are for volunteering and fun, and I am bound and determined that Sundays will be a day of rest.
When absolutely everything relies on you solely to happen a little self-discipline becomes a good thing. But guess what? I only possess a little self-discipline. This can be a problem. I'm easily distracted by everything little thing. I do try to keep my household running in such a way that I'm not distracted by it. (For better or worse, I am not distracted by messes or unclean things like dishes. If you do ever hear me complaining about such things, you know I am beyond stressed and begging for a distraction.) However, I do have dedicated cleaning times to help me survive my own shortcomings (Saturdays and Monday nights when I have nothing to watch on TV anyway.) Also, allowing routines to form in my day are absolutely essential to faking self-discipline until it actually happens. For instance, I run all errands first thing in the morning. (Most of the "work" I do is in the Pacific or Mountain time zones, so this makes more sense.) This serves two purposes- getting a distraction out of the way, and forces me to get up and get dressed. Even if the errand is running to my favorite gas station to get my daily Diet Dr P, this tiny little effort at a routine is helpful. I find that forcing a routine forces things to become habits, and that most of those habits are very good things.
The only downside to my attempts at scheduling and self-discipline so far are that first and foremost wheels I put into motion on a Monday may finally have results for me on Wednesday (my dedicated creative day). And so I lose my much needed creative day and find myself working instead. This isn't a bad thing, but eventually that creative side of me feels punished and lashes out at me in the form of ridiculous ADD and then nothing gets done on a day it needed to be done.
The past few years of first working full-time from home, and now just attempting to find work from home have been very enlightening. I think they have set me up well for what service in the Peace Corps will be like. But at the same time, I am terrified of the day I have to return to an office, and work in a confined setting. Will I like it? Or will I crawl under my cubicle and cry in the fetal position?
I have learned it is very hard to serve multiple masters like this and ever feel successful. But at the same time, this opportunity has been good for me, and has allowed me to explore new reaches of my self-discipline, dedication, and ability to overcome my own known short-comings.

This blog post is brought to you by Wednesday- the creative day. The one day a week I'm allowed to sit here and write and just be creative as needed. Otherwise, I never would have allowed myself to write such a long, rambling post in the morning. But now I must stop myself and go check my professional email account. Because "the wheels of commerce never stop turning." Not even for the day where I'd rather watch a movie and knit something. 

Tuesday, April 05, 2011

Awesome Deals from City Deals! (Utah)

Jump and Bounce (West Jordan, UT) - Trampoline fun for kids - $20 Gift Certificate for $10
Rules of the Deal
-A limit of one certificate may be redeemed per visit.
-Must use entire certificate during one visit
-Not valid for cash back (unless required by law)
-Not valid for tax or gratuity
-May not be combined with other discount offers
-A limit of 2 certificates may be purchased by each customer
-Expires 8/31/2011
Sugarhouse BBQ - $20 Gift Certificate for $10

Rules of the Deal
-By appointment only
-Limit 2 redeemed per customer
-May purchase unlimited as gifts
-Expires 9/30/2011
Forum Lazer Hair Removal - 1 Year Unlimited Laser Hair Removal (1 area) for$149 (Regularly $2000)
I'm pretty sure deals don't get better than this!!!

Rules of the Deal
-Valid toward 1 Year of Unlimited Hair Removal Sessions for 1 area
-A limit of 1 voucher may be redeemed per customer
-Not valid for cash back
-May not be combined with other offers
-Recommended 1 treatment per month
-1 per customer, unlimited may be purchased as gifts
-12 month pass starts on date of first session
-First session must be redeemed by 9/30/2011

Areas to choose from:
Chin and Lip
Bikini and Underarms
Half legs
Half Arms
Feet and Toes
Navel Line
Front and Back of Neck
Chest and Neck
Hands and Fingers
Hollywood Connection - One Day UNLIMITED Wrist Band for $5 (Regularly $20) - Deal will be off the site Sunday
Rules of the Deal
-Unlimited Amusement Rides
-Miniature Golf
-Quad Rental Skates-
-Not Valid for Cinemark Movies or Concessions
-Expires 09/30/2011
1 Platinum Car Wash - for $10 (Regularly $20)
Rules of the Deal
-May not be combined with other offers or coupons
-A limit of 2 certificates may be purchased by each customer
-An additional 2 may be given as gifts
-Expires 10/31/2011

Monday, April 04, 2011

21st Century Problems

I got a new phone a few weeks ago. It is identical to my old phone, (thanks cell phone insurance), and they carried over all of my contacts. But they didn't carry over my ringtones or settings.
Now, every time my phone chimes, and it is just out of my reach (ie- I'm too lazy to get up and reach over for it), I have to check 3 different email accounts, Facebook, and Twitter on my laptop (which is always in my lap) to determine where the message came from, or decide it was a text. (At least I know what the actually phone ringing ringtone sounds like. (It is still the NCIS theme song. Which is only confusing when the phone rings when I'm watching NCIS on TV.))
These are my 21st century problems.
What are your 21st century problems? 

Sunday, April 03, 2011

what a wonderful way to spend the weekend

I loved every single minute of the LDS General Conference this weekend. I even took the time to listen to the men's session I enjoyed it so much!
Normally I turn in my Single Thought column to the editors on Friday night. But last week, after I had written a fairly lengthy piece I felt impressed to not send it in. And instead to just listen to General Conference for something to write about instead.
WOW!  So glad I did!
There were some very hard-hitting talks specifically on marriage, and the importance of getting married. As usual the men bore the brunt of that counsel, but this time the women got some too. And for that I was very glad. You'll just have to wait till Tuesday for my column to come out to read my favorite quotes and thoughts on that subject.
Until then, here are a few of the other beautiful gems I wrote down during conference.

"Money and bank accounts are not His richest blessings." - Elder Carl B. Pratt

"The purpose of Divine Chastening is to 1) Persuade us to repent, 2) Refine and Sanctify, 3) to redirect our course to what God knows is a better path." Elder D. Todd Christofferson

"His tender mercies will make us mighty under any circumstance." Elder Walter Gonzalez

"Pain brings you to a humility that allows you to ponder. It is an experience I am grateful to have endured." Elder Robert D. Hales

"Do a little of forgiving and a lot of repenting and let it go." Elder Boyd K. Packer

"How you deal with life's trials is part of the development of faith. Strength comes when you remember that you have a Divine Nature." Elder Russell M. Nelson

"Desires dictate priorities." Elder Dallin H. Oaks

"Turn down the volume control of worldly noise. Your Father in Heaven wants to communicate with you." Pres. Uchtdorf

"Often the answer does not come while we are on our knees, but while we are on our feet serving others." Pres. Uchtdorf

"One way or another, God will have his voice heard!" Elder Holland

Saturday, April 02, 2011

72 Hour Food Storage Kit for 2 People $46

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Are you ready for one of those obtuse, vague, strongly insinuating, but provides nothing of substance blog posts? I hope so, because here we go.
In the past week several things have happened that have potential to change things for me DRASTICALLY. As in, all prayers from the past year are teasing me with almost being answered. But to get to those answers- to the light at the end of this tunnel- requires a lot of work from me. A LOT OF WORK FROM ME. And there is still no promise it will pay off.
But just in case miracles do happen, I am working my tail off and doing the very best that I can do. And did I mention I woke up on Thursday with a massive head cold? The kind of out of nowhere head cold where when you walk into the pharmacy to buy medication (the kind you show ID for behind the counter), you might put your head in your hand on the counter and accidentally fall asleep. Yeah, true story. The pharmacist actually patted me on the head.
Have you noticed that since returning to Virginia I seem to be overwhelmed by massive head colds regularly? Because I can't help but notice it every time I glance over at my nightstand. There's Benadryl, Sudafed, Claritin, Mucinex (2 types), and Nyquil. Yeah, I seem to be constantly sick recently. But today I had an epiphany! It was stupid, and I can't tell you what it was, but I figured out what is making me sick! And hopefully in a few weeks that problem will be remedied, and I will breathe freely again!
So here I am, ridiculously sick (took 3 naps today), and trying to work my butt off to make miracles happen. (Insert "there must be opposition in all things" and "sometimes you need road blocks to prevent stupid mistakes" quotes here.)
And let's add one more stress to the list. I do love writing my "Single Thought" column. I really, really do. But lately I seemed to have set a new bar for myself, and the pressure is on to reach that new bar again. Don't get me wrong, this is a wonderful problem to have. I just don't know what the solution is yet!
Never before have I been so happy for LDS General Conference. It will be on all day Saturday, April 2 and Sunday, April 3. If there was ever a time where I just needed to listen to a prophet's voice, and be counseled by the Lord's appointed, it is now. Also, getting to justify sitting and doing nothing in front of the TV all day? Also something I could really use!

Friday, April 01, 2011

Best of the Blog Part 2 - The Frisky Sailor

The only thing this picture has to do with anything is that I found it in my 2006 folder. Also, I still have that sweater vest. I don't know why.

Original Post: Kenny Rogers is Not a Frisky Sailor, August 2006

A particular candidate for THE LIST has been concerned for the last week about whether or not he is on THE LIST. He's been wondering if he is the Cowboy or not. I won't confirm or deny, but really, I'm a little insulted that he thinks I would be that unoriginal in nicknaming him. But then again, I thought he didn't read this blog, so maybe I didn't have to be so original?

Either way, we had a funny conversation today. For the sake of this conversation, he will be Kenny Rogers and I will be Dolly Parton.

Kenny Rogers: I had a weird dream about you last night. Don't worry, I'm not going to go all pervy on you here.

Dolly Parton (in her head): Dang it. (outloud) Okay.

Kenny Rogers: I had this dream that I was in your blog. You had created another "guy" list and I was labeled as the "Frisky Sailor." Which was odd because I am neither a sailor, nor have I been frisky.

Dolly searches in her head for a plausible reason for this dream. There is none.
Dolly Parton: Do you have a cat that eats Friskies? A cat named Sailor that eats Friskies? Which would be a dumb name for a cat, because cats hate water.

Kenny Rogers: Nope. But I was thinking of you and your blog before I went to sleep.

Dolly in her head only: As you should...

(What Kenny couldn't see was that Dolly got excited by that response. Most girls, Dolly or not, would. Little does Kenny know how much girls like those kinds of comments.)

Kenny Rogers: So that is probably what caused my strange dreams.

Dolly in her head: Never tell a girl you were thinking about her and then call it "strange."
Dolly Parton outloud: So what did I say about the Frisky Sailor?

Kenny Rogers: then for some reason in my dream I had braces again

Dolly in her head again: Aw, how cute.

Dolly Parton outloud: Were they the kind of braces with pink rubber bands around them? Cause those are hot.

Kenny Rogers: I don't remember what the description was just the title

Dolly Parton: hmm... not my best writing then... I'll have to work on my dream writing

Kenny Rogers: And in my dream I was like, "oh great, now I'm a freaking frisky sailor"

Dolly Parton: Well, which is worse? frisky sailor or cowboy

Kenny Rogers: Next time I'll give you back your "dream draft" with the appropriate corrections. And frisky sailor is way worse

Dolly Parton: I'd appreciate that, thanks. (Dolly pauses briefly.) A lot of sailors get lucky at fleet week. (Another Dolly pause.) I think that is coming up again soon .

Kenny Rogers: Well you had better clear your schedule then

Dolly Parton: Cleared.

Who knew a blog could invoke such dreams in a young man?

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