Monday, December 08, 2014

Roller Coaster Emotions

It was a roller coaster of a day - again.
There was good news and there was bad news and then there was more good news. Followed by, you guessed it, more bad news.
It's hard to not feel emotionally unstable when your day is whipped back and forth like that.
Ultimately it was all just news I had to accept and roll with. Nothing I could do about the good or the bad but just take it.
It didn't help that I decided on Saturday afternoon to go off caffeine and sodas. That lasted pretty well for about 48 hours. But somewhere around the third round of bad (and annoying) news, I said to hell with it, and got a Dr Pepper, curly fries, and a big fat Reuben sandwich. So much for my juice cleanse. And let me make it clear, I do not regret my choices. As BFF Juli put it, we should just all be glad I wasn't knocking over a liquor store right about that point.
That many emotions forced on a girl in one day is just not healthy!
There are many great things going on around me (friends getting dream jobs, friends getting married). I am so happy for these blessed events. But it makes the downhill slide of these roller coaster days that much farther to fall. Because on the other end of the ride, unemployment sucks, loneliness sucks, and friends dying really sucks.
Some days it feels like so much is happening around me that I'm forgetting about really huge events. (For instance, a baby being born! There was so much going on that I completely forgot a friend had a baby. And I really was truly happy for my friend and the baby.) I feel like I need to start making lists to remind myself of all the things going on around me so I don't let important things slip by. Because believe me, if I can forget a baby being born, I can forget much bigger things too.
I'm so grateful for my many blessings, and for all the highs on this roller coaster of life right now. It's much harder to be grateful for the lows. And I'm trying to be grateful for the highs that offset the lows. Or at least, I'm trying to see it that way.
But I really wouldn't mind it if there was just a nice long series of highs for a while. That would be very welcome right about now. 

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