I don't write too often here about my religious experiences and faith. I do write a lot about my churchgoing activities. But those are not the same as religious experiences. I usually choose not to share my faith because I don't care to share something so personal with an anonymous audience who may choose to criticize me for it. Call it "pearls before swine," although that would make you, the reader, the swine.
But today I feel like sharing a little bit. Why? Because along with the answers came a strong feeling that I should share it.
Recently I suffered a serious setback in one area of my life. It broke my heart. All of my hard work, efforts, and good intentions meant nothing. Someone who quite frankly didn't know what they were talking about, held all of the control in a situation, and pretty much chose to hurt me. There were a lot of ways the situation could have gone, where the person could have still exercised their control, but s/he chose the route that personally hurt me.
A lot of tears were shed over the situation. A lot. It's not often that an adult would take such measured calculations to inflict pain on another adult. But it happened.
I was left with a lot of questions along with the sadness. I was sad that someone would seek to hurt me so personally. I was hurt. And most of all, I wanted out. (And still do.) I can't think of one reason why anyone would chose to stay in a situation where such ill will is dished out.
So I prayed for an answer on how to handle the situation. I prayed for the strength to not rush back in there and yell at the other person and inflict pain of my own on them. I prayed for a huge, big, obvious answer on what to do next. The words I used specifically in my prayer were "I need an answer as big as a billboard." Because in my emotional state of mind, if it wasn't that big and obvious, I wouldn't be able to see it.
And I got my answer the very next morning. Things that never happen happened. We're talking packages arrived early even as the tracking information was still saying it wasn't coming for days. A news article publishing on exactly the right day. An email from a friend with exactly the right words and timing.
The answer I got reminded me that it's okay for things to be hard. In fact, they will probably always be hard. But there is a path laid out for me to follow, and setbacks can be a part of that path. And that there are answers to prayers that can be as big and obvious as a billboard, right when you need them the most.